Finding hope and purpose after loss and shame

This article has been moved to http://jamesrussell.org/blog/blog/an-open-letter-from-a-divorced-man

 

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  1. #1 by sanjeet on February 13, 2014 - 10:43 pm

    I am currently going through a similar rough patch at the moment.just briefly I left my wife and 5 year kid behind to work overseas for a year and when I returned was arrested for crimes that I had not commited.My wife and her solicitor boyfriend had me charged for 17 different counts .Also they had sold off all my property interests and to the extent of registering a death certificate for me in order to claim my superannuation.

    In spite of all this I am still at peace and have forgiven my wife(we are still legally married) for all the things she has done just for the sake of obtaining financial advantage.I have also told her that I will never ever press charges against her for all the forgery that she has done to obtain all this.

    Currently I am talking to some lady at my workplace and maybe will get together as she is quite understanding to my many problems.Just today i received a message from a close family friend that My wife wants to come back to me.My thinking is that since she has already moved on its time i move on but could still work out as friends

  2. #2 by Terri L Hill on September 10, 2013 - 7:25 pm

    I have really been encouraged to read so many heartfelt stories that so many people have had the courage to share! I am in a relationship with a wonderful man From Lousiana and I migrated here from Philadelphia p.a. to cultivate and nourish our bond we are planning to be married next year May 12 2014 but i am very fearful because I had been married twice before and he’s been married once before, what i am in fear of is another failed marrige which I don’t want to have to experience in my future! I don’t want to ecourage these fears to have a stronghold of my mind and control my behavior toward my future Husband and become the reason our marriage ends! But reading about these experiences and taking heed to the advice that i believed was directed to me through the leading from the power of God! And I’m grateful to have been lead this way for the greater good of my life amd my marriage! So I want to thank you all for being brave and selfless and forthcoming to share your life’s experiences to minister to others!

  3. #3 by LeelaK on August 29, 2013 - 1:19 am

    Another beautiful, inspiring story. Thank you for sharing this.

  4. #4 by ChaiWithMsSy on August 28, 2013 - 10:28 am

    You’re right. There is HOPE. And that old cliche, that time heals everything, truly does. I’ve been divorced for three years now and I just recently made peace with everything that’s happened. My ex-husband and I even shared dinner with our 4 year old son – I just wrote about it too:

    http://chaiwithmssy.wordpress.com/2013/08/26/making-peace-with-your-demons/

    Bottom line: life does go on. And you do fall in love again. 🙂 Thank you for your posts. I love your blog.

  5. #5 by Sophie Milan on August 28, 2013 - 6:35 am

    I picture David as an honest and gentleman. He deserves his second marriage. Everyone does. After heartaches and when all the lessons are learned.
    Such an inspiring story. Thank you for sharing!

  6. #6 by ddammii on August 28, 2013 - 5:08 am

    This is hope restoring….forgiving oneself is the utmost(as well as the hardest). But once one is past that, its freedom and second chance all the way.

  7. #7 by Lynda Varlack on August 27, 2013 - 9:39 pm

    Oh, how this doth preach!

    I recently gave a presentation/exhortation to my Church about the need to end domestic violence (in all its forms) against women, children and men. Tragically, it is more prevalent than many in our congregation/community realise…but mostly against women and children; and the under-reporting is as widespread as the misunderstanding. I received commendation and positive feedback from a number of persons after Services were concluded.

    I was stunned to later learn that some of the same people (of either gender) that gave positive feedback about the presentation – to the point of expressing shock and disgust over the topic – are known participants themselves.

    So many need deliverance, but there can be no real freedom or healing for anyone until light is shed on the point of hurt, and all of us accept our responsibility to unite in support of the victims in meaningful and effective ways. And we also unite in commitment to hold the perpetrators accountable, while getting them the interventions and treatment they need.

    Earlier this year, I pledged to stand up and speak out against domestic abuse. I am now convicted to do more. Please communicate to David my gratitude to him!

    His story is one whose telling is utterly necessary; and for what it’s worth, I admire and applaud him for his selfless courage in doing so. Thank God that His amazing Grace truly sets the captive free…and that David’s “happily ever after” is an eternal one!

    Completely inspired! Lynda V.

    • #8 by jennyrocajenny on August 28, 2013 - 3:56 pm

      Lynda, how did you manage to give a talk in the church about domestic violence? I can not remember a homily on this subject .

      • #9 by Anonymous on September 3, 2013 - 12:24 pm

        Me neither. 🙂

        The presentation took place before the worship service. It was given in observance of the Church’s ongoing women’s ministries department’s efforts to call/work for the end of domestic violence against women and children (primarily).

        I actually didn’t realize my response would be posted online, but there you go…

  8. #10 by jennyroca on August 27, 2013 - 8:24 pm

    ..yes, life is hard sometimes, with heartbreaking events, hard to understand…….

  9. #11 by JT Devine on August 27, 2013 - 6:22 pm

    Beautiful, incredible, and full of hope. Thank you for sharing this, and for reminding me that our lives and marriage are a journey, and the answers don’t always lie in the manuals where the ‘rubber meets the road’. ~ Jackie

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